![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
om_shatterstar posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
om_mainBenjamin interrupts Alison while she's decking the halls for Christmas. The cousins make plans.
(Backdated to December 19th)
Benjamin didn't remember Christmas, not in any substantial way, but he was quickly coming to understand that it was important. His mother had started talking about the holiday in October and he'd spent most of the morning wandering from room to room of the mansion, observing his peers as they strung up sparkling lights and hung festive plants and placed dozens of other decorations in all shapes and colors on every available surface. One of his classmates had even offered him a candy cane and the treat dangled from his lips as he continued to move through the school, no longer aimless but looking for his cousin.
Alison was hanging some tinsel and lights in one of the hallways, using a hard light hologram as a step ladder to do so. She was pretty happy to be doing so, and humming a little song as she did so. When she stepped down to get some more tinsel, she noticed her cousin, and smiled. As usual, her good mood came with a nice little glow.
"Hey," she greeted. "Like candy canes, do you?"
Recognizing Alison from behind had not been difficult and, even if it had been, the glowing step-ladder and the melodic humming would've given her away. He stood in the entry to the hall, watching and waiting and enjoying the taste of peppermint until she dismounted and turned to smile at him. "Yes," he answered and promptly broke the treat in half, offering the side still wrapped in plastic to his cousin. "Everyone is busy today." These last words were added with a curious inspection of her handiwork, leading his eyes down the hall and to the corner before allowing him to look back.
Alison took the candy cane with a quick thank you, and leaned against the wall. She was glad to see her cousin out and trying to get into the Christmas festivities. She unwrapped her half of the candy cane, and placed the bottom half in her mouth.
"Mhmm! It's the holidays, so everyone wants to get into decorating the place," Alison explained. "Do you remember anything about Christmas?"
"Some," Benjamin answered. It wasn't the truth, an exaggeration if not an outright lie, but after how sad the truth had made his mother he didn't want to deliver the same information to his cousin. His mismatched eyes flicked up toward the lights again, taking in the tiny, incandescent bulbs with curiosity. They reminded him of Alison. "Do you like Christmas?"
"Yeah, I do; there's a lot to love about it," Alison spoke, and smiled sadly. Yeah, she loved Christmas. She loved the lights, the decorations, and sometimes the gifts. However, spending time with her family had always been her favourite since it was the one day of the year where everyone would just stop and relax, even her father.
"I wish I could go home, though," she added in honestly, sounding a tiny bit sadder that time. "I miss my parents."
Alison was smiling, but she didn't look happy, and that struck Benjamin like a punch to the stomach. He stepped and turned and put his back against the wall, looking up at the glowing lights now dangling overhead and then back at his cousin. His mother had told him why she couldn't go home in the simplest terms that she could. There had been, what she had called, a 'falling out' between them and now they didn't see each other as much anymore. Because Aunt Katherine and Uncle Carter did not want to see her. When she'd said that, he'd been angry. Now, with Alison, he just felt sad. "Your parents are stupid," he said, turning his gaze to the opposite side of the empty hall, "If they don't want to see you." It wasn't the right thing to say, he was almost positive, but how could there be a right thing when words wouldn't fix any of it?
Hearing Benjamin say that was startling, but Alison got what he meant. It was blunt, and to the point. Maybe he had a point, though. For much as Alison liked to blame Lois some days, she wasn't the one responsible for their parents' choices. The way they dealt with a sparkly daughter was to throw her away, and stop caring. Maybe they were stupid, after all. She tried to tell herself that sometimes, but it was rarely convincing.
"Yeah, I guess they are a little bit. They'll regret it one day when I'm a famous singer, I bet, and Lois will too," Alison spoke. "You're very lucky that your parents are so supportive. I hope you know that, Benjamin."
"They'll regret it because you're you," Benjamin responded without looking at her, his tone certain until he ran out of words and fell into silence. He balled his fists against the wall, realizing that the anger was still there after all, and said quietly, "When I went there," no need to specify where there was, "I thought mom and dad didn't want me anymore. Or they would have come to get me." He'd learned to become numb to that feeling, even forgotten it, but like so many things it had started to come back and he couldn't remember anything that had hurt more. "I am lucky," he agreed, then, "And I am sorry."
Alison felt like Benjamin could never say something sadder than what he said right then. She didn't blame him for feeling that way, not at all. Anyone in his position likely would feel somewhat similar, she imagined. It still broke her heart to hear, though. "If your parents could have found you, they would have. They looked for you for a long time, I remember that. I don't think your mom ever gave up hope that you were alive somewhere.
She paused. "Would you mind if I gave you a hug?"
Benjamin blinked and turned to look at Alison. He knew all of that now, knew that his parents hadn't had the insuperable control he'd perceived them to have when he was a little boy and that they couldn't have helped him. He hadn't said that because he had doubts; he'd said it because he wanted to tell her that he, for once, understood. It hadn't come across right. "No," he said, wishing he could have done better, "Can I hug you?"
Alison looked at him for a second, a tiny smile crossing onto her lips. She held her arms out, getting what he was trying to say and do here. It was very touching to her, and it meant a lot that he actually was offering. She knew how her cousin could be, and the fact he wanted to make her feel better said so much. "Yeah, you can. C'mere," she told him.
There was no hesitation. Benjamin stepped away from the wall and into his cousin's outstretched arms, embracing her hard once she was in reach. He didn't seem to know his own strength and his grip was almost uncomfortably firm without the sense or the experience tone it down, but the feeling was there just the same. He cared about her and he did want her to feel better.
Alison did appreciate the hug, she did, but it was painfully obvious that he didn't know his own strength. She tried to ignore it in sake of the moment, but the poor girl did need to breathe! Not to mention, Benjamin did need to learn to not squish people. Ow.
"Not so tight, Benjamin," Alison gasped. "You gotta watch that strength of yours."
Failing to comprehend what Alison meant until he heard her heaving, Benjamin released her in one abrupt gesture and stepped back. He had the look of a deer in headlights, but gradually blinked and found his way back to his own stoic face. "I'm sorry," he murmured and tilted his head, "Did it hurt?"
"Yeah, a little," Alison admitted sheepishly, and took a nice, deep breath. "When you touch people, you just have to make sure you don't put all of your strength into it. Light touches, and don't squeeze."
Alison placed a hand on his shoulder and lightly squeezed. "Like this, see?"
Exercising restraint was different than following orders and it wasn't an area where Benjamin had much practice. He let his cousin touch his shoulder, tried to memorize the pressure she applied, and nodded. He was quiet for several seconds, then observed in a monotone voice that failed to match the faint tilt of his head, "Mom never said anything." Mom. It made him remember something. The reason he'd started looking for Alison to begin with. "Do you want to go to California?"
Alison pulled her hand back slowly. She knew what was in California, and it made her wonder if Benjamin missed his parents. Alison wouldn't blame if he did, because she totally would in his position.
"When?" she asked, feeling slightly curious. Honestly, being able to go visit family who still loved her was a very appealing idea to her. The idea that it could be for the holidays wasn't even clicking in, because she had already convinced herself that it was going to be a Christmas spent at the school.
Benjamin tilted his head again, giving her a perplexed look. The Blaires had only ever visited the Russells during the holidays, but maybe that was different now. "For Christmas," he clarified, "Do you want to go to California?"
"Oh, yeah!" Alison smiled brightly at the idea. She was happy that he was inviting her because it made Alison feel so wanted, and she wanted to hold onto that feeling. "That'd be so cool. Did your mom say to invite me?"
Both mismatched eyes focused intently on Alison for several seconds, then Benjamin nodded. "Yes," he answered, but added almost without pausing, "I want you there too." He didn't want his cousin to think he was just following orders or that he had asked only because his mother wanted him to. He hadn't asked only because it had never occurred to him.
That made Alison smile again. She was very touched that her aunt asked her, but she was even more thrilled at the idea of Benjamin wanting her there. For him to say that and feel that was a big deal to her. "Thank you," she told him. "I'll bring all of you guys Christmas presents, too. Especially you, because you deserve something cool."
Presents. Benjamin had forgotten all about presents and finding the appropriate gifts for his family members (Alison included) suddenly seemed like an impossibly daunting task. His lips pursed and formed the faint impression of a frown, but it was gone as quickly as it had come. Kurt would know what to do and he would help if he asked. "'Especially me'?" he asked.
"Well, yeah," Alison began, grinning a little. "You missed out on way too many holidays, sweetie! We have lots of time to make up for, and we have to make sure you have the best Christmas possible. You deserve to have the best time possible with our family, you know."
"Mom and dad gave me lots of presents when I came home," Benjamin pointed out, recalling his mother's scramble to get him clothes and shoes and everything that he now had upon his unexpected return, "I don't need to catch up." Then he gave Alison a faint and still unpracticed smile, "But I will bring you something cool too."
Alison could see that, as having your kidnapped child returned to you after so long would warrant for a lot of gifts. However, she felt that Benjamin had missed out on the real special part of the holidays as a kid, so she wanted to do everything in her power to make it enjoyable for him, along with memorable.
"Have you gone shopping with anyone yet?" she asked.
Benjamin shook his head. Crowded, noisy, confined places hadn't been the ideal environment for him when he'd first gone home and neither of his parents had pushed him to go beyond what made him comfortable. Not after the first time anyway. Then he'd come here and the need
to leave campus grounds had been nonexistent. "Where do you go?" he asked, "To shop."
"You go to the mall, to department stores," Alison answered. "But you can also shop using the computer, but getting stuff online takes a little bit longer. Do you remember malls and stores at all?"
"Yes," Benjamin confirmed, recalling the place through the memories of a child. The bustling crowds hadn't bothered him back then, so long as he had a secure hold of his mother's hand, but now he knew enough to be tense as he considered the possibility. So many people in one
location meant innumerable uncontrollable variables. Just like the dance. But he still needed to locate presents. "I can go there?"
"Of course you can," Alison assured him. "I could go with you, and maybe we could bring someone else if it helps you any. What do you think?"
Benjamin considered this, pushed his fingers momentarily into his blonde hair, and tilted his head. "If you're there I can't surprise you," he pointed out, "On Christmas."
"That would be the purpose of the other person," Alison explained. "I can help you get stuff for your mom, or whatever, then we could split up and then whoever goes with us could help you shop for me, and I could shop for you."
After a few short seconds spent considering the logistics of this, Benjamin nodded and met his cousin's eyes. "Can it be Jeanne-Marie?" Typically he would have asked for Kurt, but no one in the school spent more time with Alison than her roommate and, while he had only encountered the brunette a small number of times, what he had seen made him think she knew his cousin better than anyone else. Besides, that would mean Kurt having to spend part of the day alone and after last time... His features tensed as the realization clicked that splitting up three meant someone had to be alone and he added abruptly, "Laura should come too."
"Okay, that sounds doable for me," Alison said, flashing her cousin a pleased grin. She'd do anything to not only get him out into the real world and feel safe, but to make sure he had a good holiday on top of that. "Whenever you want to go, that's when we can, alright?"
She was always, always free for her cousin.
"All right," Benjamin agreed, feeling an unseen pressure lift from his shoulders. Laura could protect his cousin and, without quite understanding why, he trusted her to protect his cousin. He was silent for several seconds, then pointed abruptly back to the tinsel which he had distracted her from. "Should we finish? I can help."
"Sure," Alison smiled warmly, feeling a lot happier now than she had been this morning. She was lucky that she had other family besides the ones she grew up with her her house, that was for sure. "I'd like that."
(Backdated to December 19th)
Benjamin didn't remember Christmas, not in any substantial way, but he was quickly coming to understand that it was important. His mother had started talking about the holiday in October and he'd spent most of the morning wandering from room to room of the mansion, observing his peers as they strung up sparkling lights and hung festive plants and placed dozens of other decorations in all shapes and colors on every available surface. One of his classmates had even offered him a candy cane and the treat dangled from his lips as he continued to move through the school, no longer aimless but looking for his cousin.
Alison was hanging some tinsel and lights in one of the hallways, using a hard light hologram as a step ladder to do so. She was pretty happy to be doing so, and humming a little song as she did so. When she stepped down to get some more tinsel, she noticed her cousin, and smiled. As usual, her good mood came with a nice little glow.
"Hey," she greeted. "Like candy canes, do you?"
Recognizing Alison from behind had not been difficult and, even if it had been, the glowing step-ladder and the melodic humming would've given her away. He stood in the entry to the hall, watching and waiting and enjoying the taste of peppermint until she dismounted and turned to smile at him. "Yes," he answered and promptly broke the treat in half, offering the side still wrapped in plastic to his cousin. "Everyone is busy today." These last words were added with a curious inspection of her handiwork, leading his eyes down the hall and to the corner before allowing him to look back.
Alison took the candy cane with a quick thank you, and leaned against the wall. She was glad to see her cousin out and trying to get into the Christmas festivities. She unwrapped her half of the candy cane, and placed the bottom half in her mouth.
"Mhmm! It's the holidays, so everyone wants to get into decorating the place," Alison explained. "Do you remember anything about Christmas?"
"Some," Benjamin answered. It wasn't the truth, an exaggeration if not an outright lie, but after how sad the truth had made his mother he didn't want to deliver the same information to his cousin. His mismatched eyes flicked up toward the lights again, taking in the tiny, incandescent bulbs with curiosity. They reminded him of Alison. "Do you like Christmas?"
"Yeah, I do; there's a lot to love about it," Alison spoke, and smiled sadly. Yeah, she loved Christmas. She loved the lights, the decorations, and sometimes the gifts. However, spending time with her family had always been her favourite since it was the one day of the year where everyone would just stop and relax, even her father.
"I wish I could go home, though," she added in honestly, sounding a tiny bit sadder that time. "I miss my parents."
Alison was smiling, but she didn't look happy, and that struck Benjamin like a punch to the stomach. He stepped and turned and put his back against the wall, looking up at the glowing lights now dangling overhead and then back at his cousin. His mother had told him why she couldn't go home in the simplest terms that she could. There had been, what she had called, a 'falling out' between them and now they didn't see each other as much anymore. Because Aunt Katherine and Uncle Carter did not want to see her. When she'd said that, he'd been angry. Now, with Alison, he just felt sad. "Your parents are stupid," he said, turning his gaze to the opposite side of the empty hall, "If they don't want to see you." It wasn't the right thing to say, he was almost positive, but how could there be a right thing when words wouldn't fix any of it?
Hearing Benjamin say that was startling, but Alison got what he meant. It was blunt, and to the point. Maybe he had a point, though. For much as Alison liked to blame Lois some days, she wasn't the one responsible for their parents' choices. The way they dealt with a sparkly daughter was to throw her away, and stop caring. Maybe they were stupid, after all. She tried to tell herself that sometimes, but it was rarely convincing.
"Yeah, I guess they are a little bit. They'll regret it one day when I'm a famous singer, I bet, and Lois will too," Alison spoke. "You're very lucky that your parents are so supportive. I hope you know that, Benjamin."
"They'll regret it because you're you," Benjamin responded without looking at her, his tone certain until he ran out of words and fell into silence. He balled his fists against the wall, realizing that the anger was still there after all, and said quietly, "When I went there," no need to specify where there was, "I thought mom and dad didn't want me anymore. Or they would have come to get me." He'd learned to become numb to that feeling, even forgotten it, but like so many things it had started to come back and he couldn't remember anything that had hurt more. "I am lucky," he agreed, then, "And I am sorry."
Alison felt like Benjamin could never say something sadder than what he said right then. She didn't blame him for feeling that way, not at all. Anyone in his position likely would feel somewhat similar, she imagined. It still broke her heart to hear, though. "If your parents could have found you, they would have. They looked for you for a long time, I remember that. I don't think your mom ever gave up hope that you were alive somewhere.
She paused. "Would you mind if I gave you a hug?"
Benjamin blinked and turned to look at Alison. He knew all of that now, knew that his parents hadn't had the insuperable control he'd perceived them to have when he was a little boy and that they couldn't have helped him. He hadn't said that because he had doubts; he'd said it because he wanted to tell her that he, for once, understood. It hadn't come across right. "No," he said, wishing he could have done better, "Can I hug you?"
Alison looked at him for a second, a tiny smile crossing onto her lips. She held her arms out, getting what he was trying to say and do here. It was very touching to her, and it meant a lot that he actually was offering. She knew how her cousin could be, and the fact he wanted to make her feel better said so much. "Yeah, you can. C'mere," she told him.
There was no hesitation. Benjamin stepped away from the wall and into his cousin's outstretched arms, embracing her hard once she was in reach. He didn't seem to know his own strength and his grip was almost uncomfortably firm without the sense or the experience tone it down, but the feeling was there just the same. He cared about her and he did want her to feel better.
Alison did appreciate the hug, she did, but it was painfully obvious that he didn't know his own strength. She tried to ignore it in sake of the moment, but the poor girl did need to breathe! Not to mention, Benjamin did need to learn to not squish people. Ow.
"Not so tight, Benjamin," Alison gasped. "You gotta watch that strength of yours."
Failing to comprehend what Alison meant until he heard her heaving, Benjamin released her in one abrupt gesture and stepped back. He had the look of a deer in headlights, but gradually blinked and found his way back to his own stoic face. "I'm sorry," he murmured and tilted his head, "Did it hurt?"
"Yeah, a little," Alison admitted sheepishly, and took a nice, deep breath. "When you touch people, you just have to make sure you don't put all of your strength into it. Light touches, and don't squeeze."
Alison placed a hand on his shoulder and lightly squeezed. "Like this, see?"
Exercising restraint was different than following orders and it wasn't an area where Benjamin had much practice. He let his cousin touch his shoulder, tried to memorize the pressure she applied, and nodded. He was quiet for several seconds, then observed in a monotone voice that failed to match the faint tilt of his head, "Mom never said anything." Mom. It made him remember something. The reason he'd started looking for Alison to begin with. "Do you want to go to California?"
Alison pulled her hand back slowly. She knew what was in California, and it made her wonder if Benjamin missed his parents. Alison wouldn't blame if he did, because she totally would in his position.
"When?" she asked, feeling slightly curious. Honestly, being able to go visit family who still loved her was a very appealing idea to her. The idea that it could be for the holidays wasn't even clicking in, because she had already convinced herself that it was going to be a Christmas spent at the school.
Benjamin tilted his head again, giving her a perplexed look. The Blaires had only ever visited the Russells during the holidays, but maybe that was different now. "For Christmas," he clarified, "Do you want to go to California?"
"Oh, yeah!" Alison smiled brightly at the idea. She was happy that he was inviting her because it made Alison feel so wanted, and she wanted to hold onto that feeling. "That'd be so cool. Did your mom say to invite me?"
Both mismatched eyes focused intently on Alison for several seconds, then Benjamin nodded. "Yes," he answered, but added almost without pausing, "I want you there too." He didn't want his cousin to think he was just following orders or that he had asked only because his mother wanted him to. He hadn't asked only because it had never occurred to him.
That made Alison smile again. She was very touched that her aunt asked her, but she was even more thrilled at the idea of Benjamin wanting her there. For him to say that and feel that was a big deal to her. "Thank you," she told him. "I'll bring all of you guys Christmas presents, too. Especially you, because you deserve something cool."
Presents. Benjamin had forgotten all about presents and finding the appropriate gifts for his family members (Alison included) suddenly seemed like an impossibly daunting task. His lips pursed and formed the faint impression of a frown, but it was gone as quickly as it had come. Kurt would know what to do and he would help if he asked. "'Especially me'?" he asked.
"Well, yeah," Alison began, grinning a little. "You missed out on way too many holidays, sweetie! We have lots of time to make up for, and we have to make sure you have the best Christmas possible. You deserve to have the best time possible with our family, you know."
"Mom and dad gave me lots of presents when I came home," Benjamin pointed out, recalling his mother's scramble to get him clothes and shoes and everything that he now had upon his unexpected return, "I don't need to catch up." Then he gave Alison a faint and still unpracticed smile, "But I will bring you something cool too."
Alison could see that, as having your kidnapped child returned to you after so long would warrant for a lot of gifts. However, she felt that Benjamin had missed out on the real special part of the holidays as a kid, so she wanted to do everything in her power to make it enjoyable for him, along with memorable.
"Have you gone shopping with anyone yet?" she asked.
Benjamin shook his head. Crowded, noisy, confined places hadn't been the ideal environment for him when he'd first gone home and neither of his parents had pushed him to go beyond what made him comfortable. Not after the first time anyway. Then he'd come here and the need
to leave campus grounds had been nonexistent. "Where do you go?" he asked, "To shop."
"You go to the mall, to department stores," Alison answered. "But you can also shop using the computer, but getting stuff online takes a little bit longer. Do you remember malls and stores at all?"
"Yes," Benjamin confirmed, recalling the place through the memories of a child. The bustling crowds hadn't bothered him back then, so long as he had a secure hold of his mother's hand, but now he knew enough to be tense as he considered the possibility. So many people in one
location meant innumerable uncontrollable variables. Just like the dance. But he still needed to locate presents. "I can go there?"
"Of course you can," Alison assured him. "I could go with you, and maybe we could bring someone else if it helps you any. What do you think?"
Benjamin considered this, pushed his fingers momentarily into his blonde hair, and tilted his head. "If you're there I can't surprise you," he pointed out, "On Christmas."
"That would be the purpose of the other person," Alison explained. "I can help you get stuff for your mom, or whatever, then we could split up and then whoever goes with us could help you shop for me, and I could shop for you."
After a few short seconds spent considering the logistics of this, Benjamin nodded and met his cousin's eyes. "Can it be Jeanne-Marie?" Typically he would have asked for Kurt, but no one in the school spent more time with Alison than her roommate and, while he had only encountered the brunette a small number of times, what he had seen made him think she knew his cousin better than anyone else. Besides, that would mean Kurt having to spend part of the day alone and after last time... His features tensed as the realization clicked that splitting up three meant someone had to be alone and he added abruptly, "Laura should come too."
"Okay, that sounds doable for me," Alison said, flashing her cousin a pleased grin. She'd do anything to not only get him out into the real world and feel safe, but to make sure he had a good holiday on top of that. "Whenever you want to go, that's when we can, alright?"
She was always, always free for her cousin.
"All right," Benjamin agreed, feeling an unseen pressure lift from his shoulders. Laura could protect his cousin and, without quite understanding why, he trusted her to protect his cousin. He was silent for several seconds, then pointed abruptly back to the tinsel which he had distracted her from. "Should we finish? I can help."
"Sure," Alison smiled warmly, feeling a lot happier now than she had been this morning. She was lucky that she had other family besides the ones she grew up with her her house, that was for sure. "I'd like that."
