Simon and River - Backdated
Dec. 30th, 2014 02:01 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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om_mainSimon and River finally make that phone call home together.
River knocked once on Simon's door before opening it, already knowing that she wouldn't be walking in on anything he wouldn't want her to. Also aware that he was on his own, and that was the way she wanted it. Jean-Paul was family, but Simon was Simon, and this would be the two of them.
She closed the door, met her brother's gaze, and told him, "It's time to call them."
Simon folded his book closed as he sat up on the bed, then set it aside, studying her serious expression. "Are you sure?"
"It's time," River reiterated, coming close to sat on the bed in front of him, keeping one foot on the ground. "The equinox of desire and nerves."
He smiled softly at the phrasing and nodded. "On the bed? You can get comfortable. I'll get the laptop."
River nodded, and bent down over her legs to unzip her combat boots and pull them off, dropping them beside the bed.
Simon got up and pulled the drapes open a little more to brighten up the room, then grabbed the laptop and set it on the bed, opening it to the correct program. "Do you want me onscreen with you?"
"Yes," River agreed immediately, eyes wide on Simon. Together.
He flashed a soft smile, leaning in to press a kiss very briefly to her forehead; not long enough to overload either of them too much. Then he situated himself on the bed next to her, pulling the laptop into place as he opened the call. "Just pinch me if you want me to 'accidentally' lose the connection."
"Better than a safeword," River agreed, and focused on her breathing before her mother's image filled the screen.
* * *
As soon as the call ended, River leaned sideways against her brother, closing her eyes and tracing a mandala in her mind. A maze she wouldn't get lost it.
Simon closed the laptop and slipped an arm around her waist, loosely holding her, grounding her against him as she relaxed from the stress of the call.
It took a long moment before River felt like speaking again, a long moment to unwind, get back to who she was, not who she'd needed to be. That was a big maze, but she had been her own Ariadne. Eventually, she turned her head slightly into Simon's chest, breathed a quiet sigh, and said, "They really love us."
They were not always the best people, their love often manifested the wrong way, but there was no doubt about that. She didn't need to feel them to know that.
He nodded, sighing softly into her hair. "I think that's why I feel so guilty about what I did to them."
"You did what you had to do," River replied, frowning. "For me."
"I know," he ducked his head in apology. "I know. And I would do it again in a heartbeat."
"We share that guilt," River told him, looking up at him, eyes wide and steady.
He sighed softly, running his fingers through her hair as he met her gaze. "I know it's unfair. We shouldn't have to make decisions like this. Not yet."
"It isn't fair to ever have to make decisions like this." She straightened up a little more, even if it meant leaning against him less. "Fairness has very little to do with life."
"Let's look on the bright side. You got to talk to them, and they know you're safe and happy. I didn't even leak that you have a boyfriend," Simon smiled wryly.
"They'd want to meet him," River agreed, and... for obvious reasons that had to do with her rather than Doug, that was a bad idea.
He nodded, smiling softly at her rationale. "For what it's worth, I think they'd approve of him very much."
River hadn't even thought of that, but she smiled, now, with her affection for him. Doug was the kind of boy you brought home to meet your parents, wasn't he. "He wouldn't have made it on your list. The one you gave me when I came to the school."
Simon laughed suddenly. "God, I can't even remember what I put on that list."
"Very silly options," River assured him, her smile wider for his laughter, and the way it felt inside her chest.
"Celibacy? I hope that was an option, because it still is," Simon gave her a look, even if he was still smiling.
"About that silly, yes," River confirmed.
"That is not silly," Simon protested, eyes narrowing. "I swear to God, I will string him up by his shoelaces if he even thinks of touching you."
"Don't hurt your brain, Simon," River told him, patting his thigh comfortingly. "Denial is your best option."
"I don't know, I'm starting to think dragging him in for a full physical might be a great one..." Simon told her darkly.
"You don't want to know how I'd get back at you," River pointed out.
He stared back at her, caught between defiant, frustrated, worried about her and amused. "I don't like the idea that he might be taking advantage of you."
"I've talked to Betsy," River replied, looking back down at her hands in her lap. "I'm taking it seriously, Simon. You've got to let me."
Simon immediately felt the need to talk to Betsy about just what that conversation had entailed, but bit his tongue, then sighed. "I'm trying."
River was silent for a beat, before she leaned back against him. "I know."
River knocked once on Simon's door before opening it, already knowing that she wouldn't be walking in on anything he wouldn't want her to. Also aware that he was on his own, and that was the way she wanted it. Jean-Paul was family, but Simon was Simon, and this would be the two of them.
She closed the door, met her brother's gaze, and told him, "It's time to call them."
Simon folded his book closed as he sat up on the bed, then set it aside, studying her serious expression. "Are you sure?"
"It's time," River reiterated, coming close to sat on the bed in front of him, keeping one foot on the ground. "The equinox of desire and nerves."
He smiled softly at the phrasing and nodded. "On the bed? You can get comfortable. I'll get the laptop."
River nodded, and bent down over her legs to unzip her combat boots and pull them off, dropping them beside the bed.
Simon got up and pulled the drapes open a little more to brighten up the room, then grabbed the laptop and set it on the bed, opening it to the correct program. "Do you want me onscreen with you?"
"Yes," River agreed immediately, eyes wide on Simon. Together.
He flashed a soft smile, leaning in to press a kiss very briefly to her forehead; not long enough to overload either of them too much. Then he situated himself on the bed next to her, pulling the laptop into place as he opened the call. "Just pinch me if you want me to 'accidentally' lose the connection."
"Better than a safeword," River agreed, and focused on her breathing before her mother's image filled the screen.
As soon as the call ended, River leaned sideways against her brother, closing her eyes and tracing a mandala in her mind. A maze she wouldn't get lost it.
Simon closed the laptop and slipped an arm around her waist, loosely holding her, grounding her against him as she relaxed from the stress of the call.
It took a long moment before River felt like speaking again, a long moment to unwind, get back to who she was, not who she'd needed to be. That was a big maze, but she had been her own Ariadne. Eventually, she turned her head slightly into Simon's chest, breathed a quiet sigh, and said, "They really love us."
They were not always the best people, their love often manifested the wrong way, but there was no doubt about that. She didn't need to feel them to know that.
He nodded, sighing softly into her hair. "I think that's why I feel so guilty about what I did to them."
"You did what you had to do," River replied, frowning. "For me."
"I know," he ducked his head in apology. "I know. And I would do it again in a heartbeat."
"We share that guilt," River told him, looking up at him, eyes wide and steady.
He sighed softly, running his fingers through her hair as he met her gaze. "I know it's unfair. We shouldn't have to make decisions like this. Not yet."
"It isn't fair to ever have to make decisions like this." She straightened up a little more, even if it meant leaning against him less. "Fairness has very little to do with life."
"Let's look on the bright side. You got to talk to them, and they know you're safe and happy. I didn't even leak that you have a boyfriend," Simon smiled wryly.
"They'd want to meet him," River agreed, and... for obvious reasons that had to do with her rather than Doug, that was a bad idea.
He nodded, smiling softly at her rationale. "For what it's worth, I think they'd approve of him very much."
River hadn't even thought of that, but she smiled, now, with her affection for him. Doug was the kind of boy you brought home to meet your parents, wasn't he. "He wouldn't have made it on your list. The one you gave me when I came to the school."
Simon laughed suddenly. "God, I can't even remember what I put on that list."
"Very silly options," River assured him, her smile wider for his laughter, and the way it felt inside her chest.
"Celibacy? I hope that was an option, because it still is," Simon gave her a look, even if he was still smiling.
"About that silly, yes," River confirmed.
"That is not silly," Simon protested, eyes narrowing. "I swear to God, I will string him up by his shoelaces if he even thinks of touching you."
"Don't hurt your brain, Simon," River told him, patting his thigh comfortingly. "Denial is your best option."
"I don't know, I'm starting to think dragging him in for a full physical might be a great one..." Simon told her darkly.
"You don't want to know how I'd get back at you," River pointed out.
He stared back at her, caught between defiant, frustrated, worried about her and amused. "I don't like the idea that he might be taking advantage of you."
"I've talked to Betsy," River replied, looking back down at her hands in her lap. "I'm taking it seriously, Simon. You've got to let me."
Simon immediately felt the need to talk to Betsy about just what that conversation had entailed, but bit his tongue, then sighed. "I'm trying."
River was silent for a beat, before she leaned back against him. "I know."
